Why do Americans like Thanksgiving? THE FOOD!

Ah Thanksgiving. A time to give thanks to stuff that you wouldn’t normally give thanks to, but you do cause if you don’t your mom will yell about how ungrateful you are. We all know the only reason ANYBODY still celebrates Thanksgiving is for the food. Well at least that’s the only reason I still put up with this ridiculous holiday. I mean all you really do is sit around, watch a little football, while the mom figure is cooking up some huge meal in the kitchen. Most Americans don’t even know when the first Thanksgiving was. Oh are you the smart-ass that’s shouting 1621? WRONG!! I hate… wait, I love to burst your bubble, it was in Florida in 1565.


The only reason we have Thanksgiving is because we think its patriotic. Well personally I’m not all that ‘patriotic’ I just feel like to be proud of your country, your country should give you a reason to be proud of it… I mean I’m just sayin’. I wont go into that though. Back to Thanksgiving. So in 1565 on September 8^th the Spanish celebrated the earliest Thanksgiving in America in Saint Augustine Florida.
The Thanksgiving that is taught about in school was in 1621 in Massachusetts. Here’s some things you may not know about this particular event.

It lasted three days. So why do we only have an hour long dinner? I feel like I’m being cheated out of more food. REVOLT!

There were fifty pilgrims, 90 Wampanoag Indians, and ZERO women. Not a single one. But it was okay for them to cook the food. Just not to join in the celebrations. Typical.

THEY DID NOT EAT TURKEY! The Indians brought like five deer to the table, and the pilgrims brought filthy ducks and geese. Its so like the white man to bring mediocre birds and let the Indians bring the nice deer. I bet they had plenty left over duck.

Last but not least… The very next generation of pilgrims KILLED the Indians. Basically the first pilgrims needed the Native Americans to help them survive, but after they were back on their feet the pilgrims killed the Indians, and took their land. So what is the point of celebrating our greediness?
　I am not trying to talk anyone out of celebrating Thanksgiving, but lets think more critically about why we are celebrating certain things shall we? Lets all just admit that we like the food. I mean who could possibly deny a turkey, sweet potatoes, and pumpkin pie? No one that’s who! So I just wrote this to get people to stop lying and being all sappy about how beautiful Thanksgiving is. The only thing that is beautiful on Thanksgiving is that food. So enjoy HUGE MEAL DAY! =]